With more than half of marriages ending in divorce today, it’s no surprise to see divorces occurring among the celebrity world as in the case of Brangelina. Angelina Jolie recently started the divorce proceedings, which set the internet world on fire with everyone asking what happened? Matchmaker, April Davis and her husband, Franz, who is also a Divorce Attorney, came up with a few tips we can all learn from and may have prevented the demise of Brad and Angie's relationship.
1. Protect This House
Relationships are not just a commitment to someone, but it's a commitment to the relationship as a separate entity. Some days you're not going to be as excited or attracted to your significant other as other days, but if you're committed to the end result, a long lasting happy relationship, then those ups and downs will not be relevant when your eye is set on the goal.
Temptation can happen, especially with movie stars, if one allows for other people to get to close. We can easily believe we’re strong or place too much trust in someone by thinking, “I know they would never cheat.” or, “I have too much honor to ever break my vows”. Time and time again we've seen the strongest characters lacking in loyalty i.e. John F. Kennedy and his much publicized busty blonde girlfriend. When and if you feel a temptation, you should ask yourself if you're really willing to go down this hole, because if you think you can just dip your toes in to test the water, you're wrong. Inviting and flirting with temptation can be deadly to your relationship. You need to recognize dangers to your relationship and instill strong boundaries that can not be crossed. This is why married celebrities such as Brad Pitt should stick with roles where there isn't a romantic opportunity even if it is just "acting". After all, that's how these two got together in the first place.
2. Never stop dating
Brand and Angie were married for only two years, but together for over ten. Perhaps taking the walk down the aisle wasn't the best of ideas and they should've just stayed dating. All too often couples get married and start to take the other for granted figuring now their partner is stuck and not going to leave them so they get lazy in their relationship. Couples should never stop treating their partner like they're still dating so they can continue to grow their relationship and develop.
3. Clean up the little things
According to Franz Davis, MN Divorce Attorney, the biggest reason people divorce isn't necessarily due to one specific issue or event, but the compounding of several issues over time which ultimately become too much to handle and can't be fixed by counseling so people end up divorcing. He suggests couples take a proactive approach to work on the issues and address them as they occur, instead of sweeping them under the rug. When couples fight they typically argue over the same things again and again instead of coming to a solution once and for all. They essentially get stuck.
Davis explains, "A relationship is like a house. If one of the rooms in your house gets messy, you may just move into the next room in you never clean it up. Then the next room will be too messy to live in so you move to the next, then all of a sudden you need to just move out of your house. Such is the case in most relationships and divorces." I can only imagine this played part of the role in the demise of the Pitt’s divorce. Like most relationships, it was most likely several issues piling up that eventually seemed unbearable.
Relationships are probably one of the most complicated things that people have to deal with. It's not as easy as buying a car and selecting the features you want on that car. They take constant work and maintenance and they probably will never be what you once imagined it could be. Although, given the right mindset and willingness to put in the work, it could also be better than one ever thought possible too.