Viewing entries tagged
dating

Why You Should Talk to Strangers

Why You Should Talk to Strangers

Today Americans are lonelier than ever and it’s on the rise. According to a recent survey, more than 50% of Americans say they’re lonely. This loneliness also causes people to wonder if they’ll ever find “the One”. I’ve seen this firsthand as I grew up in a small town where you greet people when you cross paths and you wave to almost everyone when you drive by them. Having moved out of a small town, that’s definitely not the case nowadays.

You may have heard me in past talk about how you should practice talking to strangers to help improve your conversation skills. Here’s another reason why you should make it a habit to talk to strangers.

Have you ever been on a plane and really connected with the person sitting next to you? Maybe you had a great conversation and couldn’t believe when the Pilot came on to tell you to prepare for landing.  The flight just flew by.

Researchers did a study of commuters on a Chicago train. They asked 1/3 of them to engage in conversation with a stranger on the train, 1/3 to avoid people, and the remaining to just do what happened naturally. Afterwards they filled out a questionnaire assessing their commute.

The people who had the conversations reported that they had the happiest experience while the people who imagined having conversations, overwhelmingly imagined the experience as negative and rated it the worst out of the 3 groups. The study demonstrated that people have a negative outlook of engaging socially. They have concluded that the underlying reason for this is because of people’s fear of rejection is so strong. These participants believed they had a 50/50 chance of having a successful conversation. When in fact, the data actually showed that their odds of successfully engaging in conversation is almost 100%.

This is really unfortunate considering so many Americans are yearning for relationships and connecting. We are social creatures after all. So get out there and start talking to strangers!

Ready to test your newfound communication skills and be set up on the perfect date?

What People Say VS. What They Really Mean

What People Say VS. What They Really Mean

The opposite sex and dating can be confusing at times. It can be really frustrating trying to decipher what people’s intentions are and what they really mean.  They’ll act one way to your face and then completely different over the phone or via text or maybe they’ll completely disappear altogether. Today we’re going to dissect what people really mean when they say certain things.

How to Have a Great Conversation on a Date

How to Have a Great Conversation on a Date

Conversations. We hear them everyday and everywhere; on the news, on the train, at the office, at the mall. People talking about the weather, their families, the news, their lives, the new boss. In the dating world, good conversations are the key to good chemistry. Have you ever been out to dinner and your date just won’t stop talking? You wonder if you will ever get in a word in edgewise? Or have you been on a date where it is like pulling teeth just to get the conversation going? You are left with one word answers and then the dreaded awkward silence as you both wait for the check. Every now and then you will stumble upon someone who you can just talk to naturally for hours. Even after you leave the restaurant, you might still talk on the phone for longer.

But what does it take to be a great conversationalist? Perhaps conversations make you nervous. Or maybe you have been told that you dominate conversations. Once you learn to carry good conversations with anyone and everyone, you will see how easily it translates to dating and relationships. Here are four key ways to perfect the art of conversations:

Will You Ever Find the One?

Will You Ever Find the One?

Hi there! I'm April Davis dating coach and matchmaker at LUMASearch.com. Something I hear over and over as a matchmaker is: “will I ever find the one?” This question is interesting to me for two reasons. Firstly, what defines “the one?” And secondly, who has the ultimate answer to this question? We grew up with childhood fairytales and the pressure of society to “settle down” and get married. But often we are left wondering why our lives are not living up to our childhood expectations. Love and romance are much more complicated in the real world than what we read about in fairy tales or see in the movies.

Are Your Dating Expectations Too High?

Are Your Dating Expectations Too High?

Have you ever started dating someone and things were great to begin with only to be disappointed a few weeks or days later? We all have a picture in our minds of what our ideal relationship would look like. It may be half concocted from what Hollywood has sold us and the other half from seeing our friend’s perfect relationships posted all over social media.