So you went on a date with someone and you really liked them, but then you went home and you texted them, or tried calling the next day and It took a while to get a response. Right away you think oh, they don't want a relationship, they're not serious, they're just messing around, or whatever it is that you think.
Well, that to me is not necessarily indicative of someone that is flaky, it just means that they just met you and they've only gone on one date with you. Often times I hear from clients that all the people they've met, or they've gone out on dates with, or whatnot weren't serious. They weren't really looking for a relationship. I just find that really hard to believe because I meet with people all the time and that's what they want! But, when you are first in that initial phase of the relationship, you're just both going different paces. You need to get to that know you point after you've been seeing each other for a while, where you can put things on cruise control and you are actually communicating at the same kind of speed and you have that connection.
When people have these expectations of others, where they think that that person should respond right away, or should make them a priority, and should go on another date, you know it's not really the way that the world works. You know you have to earn your place in that person's life. You just met her or him, they don't know you, they don't owe you anything, so it's important to reset your expectations of people. When you are first starting out or starting to date them you don't know where they're at. They may be really busy! Or they may have all these other priorities, and they didn't have a relationship, so they filled their life with everything all these other different priorities. These priorities could change once they are in a relationship with someone, but for now they're doing whatever it is that they're they're doing. You know you'll earn that that position and place in their life eventually, but it takes a little a little bit of time so chill and relax. It's like a plant, you know you have to water it, and it has to get sunshine and it takes a while. You don't just get the flower the next day, it takes time to get there. Just understand that everybody's at a different speed and everyone's going different speeds at the beginning phase. It just takes a little bit of time for you to recalibrate and get on that same kind of playing field.
I'm curious to hear your thoughts or what are your experiences around this. Have you ever met somebody that you felt like they wanted a relationship tomorrow? Or, have you been on the other end of it where you just felt like they weren't serious and weren't getting back to you or being really good communicators, or just felt like they were flaky. I mean that is true, some people are just flaky, but of course, you know that especially at this day and age of Ghosting being really common all over the place. So anyway, i'm curious to hear your thoughts on this leave them in the comments below.