Most men want to make their woman happy. If this is you also, you’ll try to be nice by constantly letting her have her way and trying hard to please her. Most important, because you don’t want to argue, you’ll always let her win. Well, guess what? Instead of being a good boyfriend, you’ve effectively become a doormat.
You have to understand what women really want so you can avoid the “nice guy” label. We all know nice guys finish last.
Respectfully Show Your Intentions
If you want to be a good guy, you can still do it and make your intentions known. Many men are nervous about making a move towards someone they like because they’re thinking she may say no. Don’t be afraid! Give her small compliments and see how she reacts. Put your hand on her arm in order to escalate the relationship. She can’t read your mind if you won’t show her your intentions. It’s possible to be the nice guy and also risk it a little. This way, she’ll feel you’re confident enough in yourself to be a gentleman while able to make a move.
If you don’t set boundaries you risk becoming her personal toy, and she may do whatever she
pleases with you, just like a doormat. By not setting boundaries and by constantly self-
sacrificing you will never gain her respect and she will never see you as her potential lover. My husband uses the analogy of dogs. Women are like little yippy Chihuahua dogs that run around barking and acting like they’re the boss. Every once in a while she needs the big dog to come in and bark to put her in her place and let her know who the man is in the relationship. Women love this. They want a man who pushes back on them and won’t let them get away with b.s.
Have Respect For Yourself
Most men think that in order to be a good guy you have to let the woman get her way and never disagree with them. This is far from the truth and will appear as you don’t have respect for yourself. I know a guy who was married to a woman who quite frankly was a complete beep. He was good-looking, tall, had a great personality and career. By all accounts, he should have been a fairly confident guy. She treated him poorly, he never really stood up for himself. He was basically scared of her and of losing her if he ever disagreed with her. Against the advice of his friends and family, he ended up marrying her and then had two children. They had a miserable sex-less marriage until one day he found out she had been having an affair. Even then he wouldn’t leave her. She was the one that filed for divorce ultimately. The reason why I share this example is that I want you to ask yourself what is the worst thing that could happen if you do stand up to her? She may leave you? Well, she will for certain if you don’t and you will be miserable in the meantime. You have your own identity and your own life. You two together should complement and add value to each other. This is what a relationship is all about. You must respect yourself enough to say no. Believe me, if you do, you both will be happier in the long run.
Don’t Suffocate Your Partner
A woman should feel beautiful, special, and loved, but you have to be careful and not smother her until she feels suffocated. Show her she’s a part of your life, but not your whole life. Don’t follow her like a puppy wanting to spend every second with her. She’ll feel crushed by your emotions and will want to get out of this relationship. Let her miss you and give her some space.
Hopefully, this all helps you to realize the characteristics you need to embody in order to be that good guy, but not the nice guy who finishes last.
Hope this helps you. See you next time!