Does this scenario sound familiar? You see a beautiful girl across the room. You walk up to her and your mind suddenly goes blank, or you try to talk to her and she shows absolutely no interest. No matter how hard you try, you just can't figure what you're doing wrong. Hanging with your friends and being the life of that conversation is easy, but knowing how to talk to girls is whole other story.
Don't worry, every guy has been there. Gathering up the courage to even go talk to girl is never easy. Once that adrenaline starts and the nerves take over, your mind sometimes just doesn't want to cooperate. And, let's face it, girls don't always make it easy on you either. While women do realize and appreciate, for the most part, just how hard it is to even come up to them, they aren't also so responsive when you say something dumb. Luckily, there are few steps you can take to make talking to girls a little bit less stressful.
The first thing you should do before you stumble on over and make a fool of yourself, is to take a few deep breaths. This will help to calm your nerves, and give you confidence to walk across that room.
Now, let's review a few tips you can to use:
1. Talk about nonsense
Don't just walk over there with a list of boring questions or statements, like, "So, do you come here often?" or "I really like this place, what about you?" Total snoozefest. This will not make the girl want to do anything but walk away from you. The key is to start a conversation, not to ask a question that will require only a one word answer. When she does respond, make sure to follow-up with a statement, opinion or story that keeps the conversation going. Talk about anything and everything that comes to mind. Her favorite place to travel or subject in high school, then ask for her phone number. You run out of things to say when you’re nervous so it’s better to practice talking about random things to get comfortable.
2. Don't be so agreeable.
Another mistake guys make is agreeing with everything the girl says. This will only make her think you’re another guy just kissing her butt to try to get in bed with her. No one has everything in common or agrees on anything. Women want a guy who can think for himself and has his own opinion. Otherwise, she will just think you are either a complete bore, or just full b.s.
3. Don't be afraid of silence.
Look, everyone hates the uncomfortable silence, but sometimes you just have to own it. Don't try and fill every silence with a spew of verbal diarrhea. Just let it lie, and you will start to notice that the object of your affection will start to fill them. Silence encourages the girl to feel comfortable enough to ask you some questions and make a bigger effort.
4. Make the connection.
Making the connection doesn't mean trying to find something in common with the girl. Your goal should be to make an emotional connection that carries the conversation. You will want to focus on her emotions and character traits and make empathetic statements. The point is for her to feel like you’re interested and you really get her. If she tells you she used to be in Karate for 12 years, you could say, “you probably were pretty cute in your karate uniform. I bet you still can kick some butt” or “It takes a lot of determination to make it to the black belt level. You must be a very dedicated person to be able to stay with it that long.” This shows her you’re listening and you get her.
5. Become a good listener.
This is a no brainer. You need to listen to what she is saying, not just pretend to be interested. Girls are very good at detecting when a guy is not really paying attention. Being a good listener will give you clues into who she is and ideas of empathetic statements you can make.
What have you done that helped you to talk to girls? Leave your perspective in the comments below. Also, let me know what other topics you’d like me to make a video on. Did you like this video? If so, subscribe and click the thumbs up button down below.
Hope this helps you. See you next time!
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