Dating in your 50s is much more complicated than it was during your 20s. You might be reentering the dating scene following a long hiatus, maybe after going through a divorce or the death of your spouse. This can make you feel like you’re out of practice and disconnected from the current dating scene. Of course, you also carry emotional baggage from your past experiences, even if you aren’t divorced or widowed, and it’s bound to affect how you treat relationships moving forward. On top of these internal struggles, the people you meet can also make dating at 50 even more difficult. You might encounter people who want to take advantage of you in more than one way, so you have to be discerning of everyone you meet to protect yourself. LUMA professional matchmakers share three red flags to watch out for when you’re dating in your 50s:
1. They’re secretiveIt’s normal to be afraid of vulnerability when you’re getting to know someone new, especially when you’ve been through your fair share of failed relationships. So, it’s understandable if your potential partner is hesitant to share intimate information about themselves. However, there’s a difference between being cautious and being secretive. If they don’t share general information, such as what they do for a living, where they work, or their current relationship with their ex-spouse, you have to be careful of trusting them with your own information. Withholding these kinds of information is a red flag because it could mean that they’re hiding something major from you or that they don’t want to deepen their relationship with you. Either way, you deserve someone willing to be more open with you.
2. They’re going too fastOn the opposite end of the scale, taking things too fast is another red flag when you’re dating in your 50s. It can seem like a good thing when someone is eager to take their relationship with you to the next level. But you have to be careful not to be swept away by your potential partner’s zeal at the cost of your own well-being. When your partner is going faster than you, their actions and behaviors can feel stifling. They might grow overly needy or demanding, which can make you feel uncomfortable. You also have to consider the possibility that they might have an ulterior motive for speeding up your relationship. For instance, if you’re financially stable, they might be taking advantage of your desire to find a partner for their financial gain. In any case, it’s important to date somebody willing to match your pace, especially if you’ve only recently re-entered the dating scene. You need to communicate with the other person if you need to take things slow, and if they can’t respect that, they’re not worth your time.
3. They’re fixated on their pastAnother red flag is if someone’s too attached to their past relationship. Of course, you can’t expect them to completely let go of their former spouse, and they shouldn’t demand the same thing from you either. But if you notice that they keep bringing up issues from their past that you two have already talked about or resolved, then that likely means that they’re still working through some internal struggles. When your date is fixated on their past, they could also unknowingly subject you to unreasonable expectations. They might expect you to act or behave like their previous spouse, which is unfair for you. You don’t want to be with somebody who’s constantly comparing you with their ex or deceased spouse.
Navigating Dating in Your 50sDating in your 50s can be difficult and scary, but this shouldn’t stop you from finding love again. Be careful of whom you’re opening up to but don’t be so afraid of meeting new people that it gets in the way of your relationships. If you find dating overwhelming, consider matchmaking services. Professional matchmakers make the dating experience more comfortable and convenient by eliminating the exhausting trial-and-error process. They’ll set you up with someone who matches the description of your ideal partner, increasing your chances of being compatible with that person. Interested in trying professional matchmaking? Look no further than LUMA Luxury Matchmaking. Contact us today, and our matchmakers will help you reemerge in the dating scene with confidence.
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